by What does home mean to you? In an article for Telegraph Travel, Clover Stroud reflected on how her family’s move from the Cotswolds to Washington DC last summer gave her a different perspective on how she defines home.
Although she still feels that she is “in the country”, she explained how “home can be a feeling as well as a place, and more than just an expression of a person”.
Clover’s experience struck a chord with Telegraph readers, many of whom have moved abroad to the US or the UK.
‘USA is the best place to start a new life’
Jane Seccombe, 67, immigrated from South Africa to the United States with her husband in 1994.
Jane explained that they were both journalists for many years in South Africa and won visas through the Immigrant Diversity Visa (DV) Program, where they became naturalized US citizens in 2005. “We would not have immigrated to USA without him,” Jane told him. .
What stood out to Jane was how the US “values hard work and offers opportunities no matter who you are or where you come from”, but “you have to be adaptable and willing to get your way to do in and up again.”
With little money, the first few years were “really uncomfortable,” Jane said. On their one-way flight to New York, she recalled occupying a week’s holiday in Rome: “I thought it would probably be my last holiday ever! I am happy to say that was not true.”
Jane didn’t consider the culture shock of living in a foreign country, not to mention missing her family and old friends. Fortunately, she managed to visit South Africa many times. “It’s still great to be like everyone else and not stand out with my accent.”
Now retired in North Carolina, expressing exactly when the US felt like it was difficult to figure out home for Jane: “Sure, there are still moments when I’m suddenly overwhelmed by the whole strange feeling, but I have moved on and my old world. have moved on without me.”
‘I miss the green fields of England’
Moving to England has always been a dream for Tom Donley, 71, and in 2003 he made the big move from Houston, Texas to Lincolnshire with his wife Pamela, 78, where she grew up. The couple moved into a “wonderful” old forge and stables in Ranby.
Tom recalled many fond memories of living in Lincolnshire, including watching the Red Arrows regularly practice their “aerobatics in the skies” and visits to Lincoln Cathedral.
In 2010, the couple had to return to Houston after Ruthie, Tom’s younger sister, suffered a stroke and required constant nursing care. “I knew what a sacrifice Pamela was prepared to make by leaving England, let alone Lincolnshire. Not much to consider a sacrifice,” said Tom. Ruthie died in Tom’s arms in September 2023.
When they returned, Tom described how he went through a “grieving period”, having to adjust to a different pace of life and a completely changed landscape. “It took me a while to get used to leisurely ‘commuting’ up single country lanes where I spied hares, necked pheasants, deer and badgers to the high speed roads that turned everyone into a Nascar driver just for a living.”
Although the couple visited England a few times ago, Tom explained that they are “happy homemakers” and are “no longer interested in dealing with the pains of international air travel”.
“Pamela and I will forever miss our English garden, our friends, and the pace of life that the welcoming people of Lincolnshire are giving us so gently.”
Reflecting on his travels, Tom said: “We all have to live life on life’s terms, I think and make the most of where our lives take us, or at least try to to do.”
‘California was like living on a despicable film set’
Patience Lacy-Smith moved to California to be closer to her two daughters and three grandchildren, but it wasn’t as simple as she had hoped.
“I wasn’t naive about the ways of doing things,” explained Foighne. “I had bought a flat beyond my means and led myself down a path that nearly destroyed me.”
With no other option but to return to the UK, Patience felt “shaken to the core”, but three years later, she decided to try again and returned to California.
While living in California, Patience was struck by how “horrible” the people are on the roads. “They think nothing of sweeping across five lanes to reach their desired exit or driving in and out of traffic a bit like a bendy race at a gymkhana,” she said.
This was ironic with Patience as it took her three attempts to pass the test there, despite having been driving around London for years. “Ageism had a lot to do with it,” she said.
Patience described how customer service soon went downhill, the political scene turned ugly, not to mention “being judged by your car, your address and your designer clothes. You have to be blonde, you have to have regular Botox treatments and you have to be thin.”
Ultimately, what made Patience return to her roots back in the UK was how expensive it was to rent, where it was usually more than $6,000 a month. pay to landlord. Life in California was “like living on a mountain movie set, all designed to make you feel like you’re ‘living the life’. It’s fake,” she insisted.
“Regarding my family, I achieved my goal with the grandchildren and they and I are very close,” revealed Patience. “My daughters feel exactly the same as I do but neither of them can leave California right now.”
Now living on the edge of Exmoor, Patience is happy and wouldn’t trade it for anything: “Life here is good. Nobody pretends to be anything. If they did, they would soon become crops!”
