by THE EDEN PROJECT
Kevin De Bruyne, good as ever? As the Manchester City machine crushed Brentford 3-1 to close at the top, Jamie Carragher – fresh from the Emirates – thought so. “If you put him in Liverpool’s net, Liverpool would win the league,” he said. “I think it’s so dominant.” Comparisons were made with the greats of Ár Craobh. “Cantona, Zola, Bergkamp … he is better than all of them,” squeaked Carra, although one name was omitted, another famous Belgian, a player who could be more talented than King Kev. Only five months older, too.
Eden Hazard is a forgotten man, but he was one of the best players of the 2010s. Chelsea won the auction for Lille’s little genius in 2012, and for £30m, they got a player who was the creative inspiration behind two title wins, in 2014-15 under José Mourinho and then 2016-17, under Antonio Conte. There were nights when he couldn’t touch it, slaloming through defenders, bullets in his boots, shooting as venomously as De Bruyne. It wasn’t all gravy. There have been knack issues and public beefs with both Mourinho and Conte, among others. Hazard has never been the type to sit through hours of analysis or knee-jerk study of opponents. He just wanted to play. Scoring home a penalty in the 2019 Grand Vase final was his last act in blue before he was lost in a glitch in the space-time continuum that leading physicists recognized as ‘rubbish for Real Madrid’. As with Kaká, the player’s previous stratospheric heights of brilliance were nullified by his Bernabéu ban.
Last weekend saw Hazard – £88.3m for 54 games, but four goals – hit back by admitting that, yes, most of what he was accused of was true. But also, you know, you know, starting with memories turning up more than a heavy stone. “Now that I’m in Madrid, this might be the last vacation I’ll be able to take,” he said. “And I shoot myself like I shoot myself every summer. Seven years in England, without a break at Christmas, giving everything, so when I have three or four weeks off, ‘don’t bother me’, barbecues, rosé wine … that’s all.” It’s like 5pm on a Friday for Football Daily.
Hazard went on to speak for the little man inside the big one, saying: “I like to eat and drink with my friends. Diet is bull [snip – Football Daily Bad Word Ed], it doesn’t work. If you want to play until you are 40, then fine. But I knew I wouldn’t be like that. I always have some champagne in my fridge.” It is not for Hazard’s sake that the elite of football blesses the afterlife: Saudi Arabia, MLS, alienating the locals by not playing in lucrative friendlies. “Leave me with my friends, let’s go home, play cards, get a beer,” he said, kissing his most famous colleague. “Christians [Ronaldo] He’s a bigger player than me but, in terms of pure football, I honestly don’t think so [he’s better].” Using Hackney Marshes’ beer/burger rating system, it’s hard to disprove that purity rating.
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STATEMENT OF THE DAY
“We had an open door training session. I went out because there was such a big crowd and there was a clinic with the kids, and I wanted to be there and take part. But the truth is that the discomfort was still there and it was very difficult to play. I understand that people were looking forward to him … For tomorrow, I don’t know, we will have to see how he goes in training. We still don’t know if I would be able to or not, but I feel much better than I did a few days ago and I really want to play” – after incurring the wrath of the fans in Hong Kong with no show for Inter Miami friendly Lionel Messi opens up the possibility of turning out in the next stop of his pre-season circus against Vissel Kobe.
DAILY FOOTBALL LETTERS
I see that New Jersey’s MetLife Stadium has been chosen for the 2026 World Cup final (and the inevitable and elaborate closing ceremony that entails). The stadium is only seven miles from downtown Manhattan, where the stars keep their fancy apartments. So if Diana Ross needs a penalty coach, I’d like to let her know that I’m available to travel up from Philadelphia Monday through Friday, and it’s never too early to start practicing” – Justin Kavanagh.
Can I admit to being one of those horrendously misguided West Ham supporters who the TV people take great delight in trashing our ingenuity and entitlement whenever there is any concern in tell about Moyesausaurus? ‘Be careful what you wish for,’ they wisely advised us. Even the poor fools who follow every exciting moment realize that, in the words of the great man himself, a club like West Ham cannot hope to compete with the resources of Newcastle and … (ahem) Aston Villa, only to lose 3-0 (and the fabled sixth place) with a bare bones outfit like Manchester United really stings. Looking ahead, perhaps a two-year extension will allow the Chosen One and Kevin ‘iPad’ Nolan to finally burst all the beautiful bubbles and show us that we really had the dream, even the Sky that reach (Super Sunday). . Time to die?” – Brian Ó Kinnáin.
Oh well, we all know that the phrase ‘he really is’ (yesterday’s Football Daily letters) fits Timperley’s best, Frank Sidebottom. After an exhaustive search on YouTube (30 minutes), this is the closest I can find. But Frank fans will know” – Colin Sharples.
Re: Memory Lane (Yesterday’s football, full email edition). How nice to see a good old fashioned goal put into the ground. What’s with the current way where the goals aren’t even attached properly so that the back end lifts off the ground when a scrum goes in? I can’t wait for the day when full thunder (preferably from any Bournemouth player) hits the whole frame” – Alan Mannings.
Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s letter winner is … Brian Withington, who offers a copy of The Social One: why Jürgen Klopp was the perfect fit for Liverpool, published by Pitch Publishing. Visit their football bookshop here.
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