by Tis the season for festive celebrations, but if you thought your velvet suit and kitten heel party combo was safe and sound, think again. It seems that a 2023 style party comes with some festively appropriate dress codes. Over the past few weeks, the Telegraph’s Fashion Desk and I have been treated to some pretty eclectic outfit themes: “Fur and candlelight”, “La Dolce Vita”, “Refined luxury”. And then came Beyoncé with the first party for her Renaissance concert film, specifying a strict dress code for her guests: “Cosy Opulence”.
“There are dress codes everywhere now, even for a dinner party in town. I like the idea of a dress code, and the crazier and more random these are, the more fun it is to research the right outfit,” says Gianluca Longo, style director of the ever-suited The World of Interiors on him. “In the past it was Studio 54 and The Royal Tenenbaums, now anything goes.”
But what does it all mean? Are we finally having that roaring Twenties moment we imagined pre-pandemic, when our social lives resemble the opening sequence of a Baz Luhrmann film? Faced with a glaring dress code, how does a regular killer who doesn’t conjure up moodboards for a living actually navigate? How much sparkle is too much sparkle? Does “fur and candlelight” allow the Norse goddess to dress up in a fur snood and carry a lantern? (My nephew’s girlfriend, Gen Z, chimes in here to explain that I should think of “fur and candlelight” as more of a social media hashtag mood; projecting a cozy hygge vibe; though this doesn’t mean encouraging wear cashmere joggers.)
Are these new dress codes really guidelines or puzzles to crack? More formal industry events seem confusing. Gwyneth Paltrow and Demi Moore were photographed together at the Council of Fashion Designers of America awards a few weeks back. You may remember the GP who was dressed in a tightly tailored cocktail skirt and was frankly fabulous from her own G. Label collecting goop and sweater (yes, Aspen). Demi, however, was stunning in the mirror ball, glittering silver sequined all-out bling, courtesy of Carolina Herrera.
The dress code for this event, dear readers, was American Black Tie. Although I live and work in New York, this was new to my ears. And, if you’re wondering, it doesn’t appear on that oracle of American etiquette the Emily Post Institute website, among the various categories of Black Tie dress requirements, including “Creative Black Tie” and “Black Tie Optional ” (the latter being the dress code you should choose if you want to induce maximum event shopping frenzy and spousal friction among your entire guest list, at least in my opinion).
I was thinking about all of the above recently when I attended Greek designer Celia Kritharioti’s launch party at Harrods. The invitation read: “Festival attire, blazers for the boys”, which I thought was pretty informative as these things go. The party turned out to be a fair bone of contention, with excitement as far as the eye could see and plenty of boogying among the velvet banquettes.
Here I met Sukeena Rao, co-founder with Harriet Quick of the personal shopping service Luminaire, whose specialty is dressing clients for such elevated events. “Celia’s party is a good example of ‘cosy opulence’, the fires were on, the girls were in crystal dresses, but the atmosphere was comfortable,” says Rao, speaking on Zoom the next day . She says she noticed a new mood in the air for the 2023 party season, which is reflected in the dress codes; which she describes, in part, on the global context. “There are a lot of difficult things in the world … People still want to go out, do that Christmas thing and see people, but at the same time the tone feels a little bit warmer and warmer than usual.”
Rao says she interprets a fancy dress code like “cosy opulence” to mean “dressing up, but dialing it down to a point,” adding: “It’s about getting something great in your closet. It’s not really about wearing a full runway look.”
In many ways, tastemakers like Rao and the super stylists who dress the stars we scrutinize online every day are setting the new standards for how we adhere to sartorial rules and themes. I talk to celebrity stylist Holly White, who dresses new talents like Bridgerton’s Charithra Chandon and Heartstopper’s Joe Locke, about how she interprets the new party dress codes: “I tend to use dress codes as a guide to feeling or measuring total energy. the eventfor clients but ultimately, we are trying to land something that makes the client feel the best and most confident! I love seeing how people interpret ‘black friend’ – it’s not as traditional as it once was, it’s much more creative, people are keeping their looks in new and interesting ways while still feeling uplifted and ‘connected’ black’.”
So what do the traditional gatekeepers of event etiquette do with it all? I turn to Liz Wyse, Debrett’s etiquette expert.
“Dress codes are definitely becoming more creative and dynamic, and it creates a problem for guests, who don’t really have much guidance about the level of compliance required. While code like ‘cosy opulence’ is really just a fancy way of saying ‘smart evening wear’ (with a nod towards the winter season), ‘fur and candlelight’ is much more esoteric. Without carrying a candle, a guest had better observe the ‘fur’ part of the dress code. Of course, while there are those who love to go the extra mile when it comes to creative dress codes, if you’re more discreet and relaxed you can admit it with accessories – fur stoles, fur-trimmed evening gloves and so on . This will show that you are aware of the dress code and have made a gesture to comply with it.”
Wyse admits that the dress codes of our parents’ generation are loose.
“Dress codes have definitely moved on from the very strict traditional rules, which allowed no deviation, to a looser and more liberal interpretation. In general, if these old-fashioned terms are used, the code is expected to be adhered to. It is becoming more common to use more generic terms such as ‘cocktail attire’, ‘smart frocks’ or ‘party dress’. These codes free guests, especially men, from strict restrictions. They can wear dinner jackets and bow tights if they choose and opt for smart lounge suits, velvet jackets, Nehru collars and so on. Women can wear whatever dress or trouser combination they think will make them look chic and glamorous.”
So how do night-out night-out tips guide some of the festive sartorial dress codes currently on The Telegraph staff mantel? Over to the gentleman around town, Gianluca Longo: “I always love the La Dolce Vita dress code: Think Anita Ekberg for women and for women. The talented Mr. Ripley for the men. Refined comfort? Look at Ralph Lauren.” In general, he advises: “Google the dress code, look at the image tab and see what comes up, use your imagination to mix and match.”
Fashion entrepreneur Maria Kastani, who is following Tiffanie Darke’s “Rule of Five” and buying nothing new for the season, says she wants to look and feel “luscious, beautiful and delicious” at parties after the challenging year we’ve had . , but she’ll be diving into her closet for her favorite wow outfits and letting her accessories speak to any given party theme. The party’s new spirit is “more about feelings, than about displays”, she says.
Sukeena Rao agrees with the more casual approach to buying this season and is advising her clients to invest in knockout accessories. “I think most women have something great in their wardrobe that they can mix with, say, a black leather mules from The Row, or an Alaia mesh brogue, and take it to another level.”
And what are the words of advice for the more careful dresser, from whom finding the courage to oomph up his outfit to sub-Beyoncé levels of “comfortable opulence” is a bit nerve-wracking.
“Put on some fun, loud music when you get dressed and keep adding more accessories than you normally would. They can come out soon after arriving at the party … or not.”
Well, that’s one new party dressing rule I intend to follow. Bye the music!
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